


As the Rain Falls

by andabatae



Series: One-Shots and Drabbles [10]
Category: Star Wars, Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, F/M, but no death, canonverse, grievous bodily injury, tros speculation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-11
Updated: 2019-10-11
Packaged: 2020-12-09 06:37:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20990477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andabatae/pseuds/andabatae
Summary: How strange, to experience a rebirth just before his death.





	As the Rain Falls

**Author's Note:**

> This is a drabble for Flydam Friday! The prompt was "Forgiveness & Broken" in honor of House Flydam and House Cryber, which means it's angstier and less explicit than my usual stuff. I hope you like it!
> 
> UPDATE: There is now a Russian translation! Thank you so much to [Elafira](https://twitter.com/Elafira2) for doing this. I'm honored! <https://archiveofourown.org/works/22667155>

Kylo Ren stared up at the slate-gray sky. The clouds were heavy with rain—rain he wasn’t sure he would live to feel on his face.

He couldn’t feel anything below the neck, so he was glad that, for this final battle with Palpatine, he’d chosen to discard his helmet. Toss it aside like so much dead history, jettisoning the weight of a lost child and an even more lost man.

Ben Solo, Kylo Ren… they were both gone now. Whoever was left in this broken, battered body was someone new.

How strange, to experience a rebirth just before his death.

The patter of raindrops pinged on the stone around him. Kylo closed his eyes, reveling in the cool prick of water against his skin. Years on starships had shown him an entire galaxy and given him more power than any one man should ever have, but he’d missed out on small pleasures like this. He inhaled deeply, grateful he couldn’t feel any pain where his ribs jutted through the torn fabric of his tunic like jagged mountain peaks.

The pattering grew louder, a rhythmic thudding that seemed far too substantial for rain. Kylo cracked his eyes open just in time to see Rey collapse to her knees beside him. He’d been blocking the bond so she wouldn’t know what he’d done; now he opened it again and was inundated with the burning glow of her goodness and her fear.

“Ben.” Her voice broke on his name, that old, dead name that still didn’t quite describe who he’d become. Days and months of loving her had shaped him into a new man, and this final sacrifice—facing Palpatine alone to protect her from the potent lure of the dark—had transformed him, too. He felt lighter—not just in body, but in soul.

“Rey.” He breathed her name like the prayer it was. “You shouldn’t be here.”

Water streaked down her cheeks, and it took him a moment to realize she was crying. She glared at him through her tears in that way only Rey seemed able to do: fierce and vulnerable all at once. “You promised you’d wait for me. You promised you’d let me fight with you.”

He tried to shake his head, and a dull pop in his neck sent a wave of dizziness over him. When he tried to speak, the words came out on a croak, so he licked his lips and tried again. “He would have targeted you. Seduced you to the dark.”

“No,” Rey said stubbornly. “I wouldn’t have let him.’

“No, Rey.” Ben was tired, so tired. Black puddled at the edges of his vision. “You still don’t understand the dark. He would have shown you everything you ever wanted: your parents, your friends alive and whole. The chance to bring Han, Luke, and Leia back. Anything to gain your power for his own use, and you’re so damn self-sacrificing you would have done whatever it took to help the people you love, even if it meant falling.”

That speech had used up almost all of his reserves. The darkness was coming on faster, but this wasn’t the cold, enveloping blackness of the dark side of the Force; it was soothing, like being covered in a soft blanket and told to close his eyes and go to sleep.

He didn’t realize he had closed his eyes until Rey cupped his cheek and he realized he couldn’t see her. A moment later, something brushed his lips, soft and gentle.

Even mostly dead, Kylo Ren wasn’t about to miss whatever this was. His eyelashes fluttered open, and he found Rey just above him, her eyes squeezed shut while her mouth moved over his gently. It was nothing like the furious kisses he’d imagined a thousand times in fevered fantasies. This was soft and sweet. Comforting.

Rey’s lips left his far too soon. She rested her forehead against his, and for a moment they breathed in each other’s air. Then Rey shifted, and Kylo realized she was trailing her hand over his chest, just above his most grievous wound.

“That’s the thing, Ben,” she whispered against his lips. “_You’re _ who I love. _ You _are everything I’ve ever wanted.”

At that, Kylo started to cry. “I’m sorry, Rey,” he choked out. “For everything. I’m so, so sorry.”_ I love you_, he thought frantically across the bond as his throat closed up. _ So much_.

His vision was almost entirely gone. Only a faint glow was left, something blue and soothing that flickered over his heart. Maybe it was his soul leaving his body.

“It’s all right,” Rey whispered. He couldn’t see her, but he could feel her in the Force, golden and strong. “I forgave you a long time ago.”

The blue light intensified, and a lance of pain shot through Kylo’s chest. But he was paralyzed, how…

“Come back to me, Ben.” Rey’s voice was firm and unyielding. The glow cut through the shadows, revealing her hovering over him like an angel, her delicate features awash in light. She shifted her hand lower, over the jagged peak of his ribcage, and Kylo gasped as his rib settled back into place with a grinding sound and a burst of agony.

She was healing him.

“It’s not over between us,” Rey vowed. “It’ll _ never _ be over.”

When Kylo’s neck popped back into place, the pain that ravaged his body was like nothing he’d ever felt before.

And Kylo Ren wept with joy.


End file.
